Every couple that I have had the pleasure of working with has had their own sense of how the day should flow. Some want to stick rigidly to the time schedule while others are much more laid back. Either way, my goal is to ensure that all the elements of the day are successfully carried out, while also making sure that all vendors and speakers are ready to go when the time comes. This is where having a MC is great (whether you hire one or ask a friend) as they help to pump up the party, explain any house rules and they act as a transitionary element when introducing different speakers or entertainers. Having an MC isn't always necessary though- but if that's the route you want to go make sure to discuss this with the DJ prior to the event. Most DJ's are open to being the MC, they just like to be prepared- as we all do.
Well this lovely couple had decided to forgo the traditional wedding party but had a friend who had agreed to MC. As I always do, I introduced myself to this individual and told him to let me know if he needed anything. The set up for the event went pretty smoothly- as the family and the MC were pretty hands on. The venue- which is a local renovated greenhouse is a beautiful backdrop for any event, and it was full of activity as the ceremony time ticked closer. I noticed a few minor issues with the setup in the reception room but it was time for lining the bridal party up for the procession and it would have to wait until cocktail hour got started. As the ceremony began to start you could feel the energy tingling in the air as the guests began to hush. A beautiful quartet melody began as the groom began his walk up the aisle to wait for his soon to be wife. This part of the wedding day always brings me so much joy. I love watching the family and wedding party as they wait for my cue to begin their walks up the aisle. This evening was no different. The processional may have been short, but the joy and happiness flowing from each individual was quite palpable- also they had their Golden Retriever as their flower girl and I love myself a Golden. :)
As the ceremony wrapped up and the guests flooded into the cocktail space, I kick it back into high gear as I head back into the reception room. First thing I needed to deal with was the sports game table they had set up by the bar. This was an open bar event and it's a fairly small bar area and having a large table in the middle of the space would have just been mayhem during open service. I start to look around for a pair of hands to help me move this large, heavy table. I hadn't hired an assistant for this job since I didn't know the family would be setting up games and I hadn't expected any major lifting. This venue is great but sometimes it's hard finding staff to help. Unfortunately, this specific night the venue coordinator physically wasn't able to help due to an injury and the bartenders had their own roles that they were busy with. The caters were also focused on their roles and this is exactly what they needed to be doing. So I go on the search for the MC- thinking he wouldn't mind to help me for a quick moment. As I approached him, I asked him if I could use his assistance for just a quick moment so that we could go through the timeline since he was the MC. I also explained that I needed help to move the table that was in front of the bar. He took a quick sip of his beer and told me he was just going to hang out at the cocktail area for a bit and he didn't want to MC anymore past the introduction. I was taken back slightly, as I've never had someone refuse to help or quit before even starting, but I didn't have time to worry about it so I quickly departed to solve my problem in another way. To the DJ booth.
Thankfully, the DJ was glad to help me and we took a few moments to discuss the new game plan for the evening. The DJ was also a bit surprised but was a good sport about it- my role here is to ensure the DJ had the proper names and the timeline of each speaker. I also ensured that each speaker was ready for when the DJ announced them to the microphone. Some speakers were reluctantly ready to speak, while others had to be coaxed up as the light turned onto them. Each speaker has their own reasons for either wanting to speak or not being open to doing so. I have to play a light little dance with those who are hesitant- I'd never want to someone to feel pressured into doing something they weren't comfortable with, but my role is to breathe life into the elements that each couple has determined important enough to make it onto their day of schedule. A parents speech is usually one that a child will remember for many years- good or bad.
Fear of being seen sneaks up when our emotions are vulnerable. How much more vulnerable can a man be on the day his little girl is marrying the love her life. All eyes on him and a possible worry of being seen as "weak" if he so happens to lose his words due to his emotions- as he struggles to keep the tears that have a strangle hold on his words. So I stand there as the father of the bride asks me to skip him, I delay looking for the right words to say. Then the DJ announces his name and he looks at me realizing he has no other choice. I place my hand on his arm for a moment, "You got this." He nods a tense, barely noticable movement and stands up like a warrior heading into battle. He stands at the podium and his little girl watched him with a tenderness and trust that brought a tear to my eye. I slip away out of sight and find my seat for a moment- grabbing a quick bite and a sip of water. Taking another look at the schedule, preparing myself for the next element of the event.
This is what I love to do. Ensuring that my couples or clients are seen and heard. Being able to coordinate such important events is such an honour- and knowing that I can create a moment of full presence to truly tap into the sacredness of what you are celebrating. That is pure love, living in the moment of joy. Love exists in every moment and in every person- but if you are so worried about what's happening in the background- your attention will be spilt and the day will fly by and before you notice it, the day is over and you never gave your Self permission to soak in the radiance of that love. That would be a shame and I hope everyone finds a way to be present on their wedding day and every day.
So when that MC quit that night, I was there as the coordinator to ensure that we pivoted to the next plan and to be honest I don't even think anyone else noticed the change because the couple had decided to invest in their love and gave themselves permission to be fully present that day they said "I do".
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